This is where I’m supposed to put crap about me.
Let’s see. I make a crappy secret santa. I’m pretty damn good at baking. I suck at managing money. Money hates me. Lesbians hate me. Truckers and old men with beards like me. I know lots of rural stuff, like what legs a cow uses first to stand up. I’ve written half a book. I’ve also read halves of books, then never picked them up again. In a fight between James Garner and Chuck Norris, James Garner would win. I can make a cherry pie, charming Billy. I have a thing for Pee Wee Herman. But it’s very small. I sometimes develop completely inappropriate crushes on men. In elementary school, a schoolmate and I wrote a letter to Henry Kissinger, and he replied only to me. In 1967, I was 100 years old. Things aren’t always what they seam. I like to drink sometimes, but on the sly.
Whatever it is, I’m against it.
I believe in subliminal hot sex messages. I can judge a book by its cover.
gossamer